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The
Goofy Controversey
Engaging anyone who'd give me a moment on the subject, I found several friends and family who would humor me while I pondered how Walt Disney - the person, not the company - must have stayed up those many late nights of his early years as an illustrator, coming up with the Goofy character for his cartoons. Inserting this controversial curmudgeon into his storytelling was a stroke of genius. For me, the
controversy centered on the fact that Disney already had a dog, Pluto.
So, what on earth did he need with another dog? It became a year-long
odyssey for me - just what I needed to occupy me between naps in the
afternoon. Consider these ‘kibbly bits’ of evidence and then you decide: 1.) If Goofy were a dog, don't you think Disney would have had him bark once in awhile? Pluto barks all the time. Why doesn't Goofy? 2.) Goofy talks - speaks several languages. He has conversations with Mickey and Minnie. 3.) Goofy shops. I remember one time when Mickey was down with the flu and he sent Goofy to the drug store for some strong cough syrup. Now, a St. Bernard might be able to fetch a newspaper. And a beagle might retrieve a pheasant for a hunter. But, a dog goes to a pharmacy, gets medicine off the shelf and then pays for it? Not a chance. 4.) Goofy stands upright and walks around on two feet. If he were a dog, don't you think he'd be down on all fours, prancing around like Pluto? Why doesn't Goofy do that? 5.) And what about the hat? Goofy wears a hat. Dogs don't do that. 6.) And Goofy not only wears a hat - he wears clothes. Pants, shirts and shoes - he has an entire wardrobe! Why, he's a living advertisement for the Danny Discount menswear department. 7.) Well then, it turns out that Goofy isn't so goofy after all, is he? In fact, the contrast between Pluto and Goofy is so startling that the very existence of Pluto proves the point. Can’t you see them standing next to each other. If you saw them out in your driveway right now, wouldn't you be able to tell which of them wasn't the dog? Can't you see that it would have to be Goofy bent over and petting Pluto, and not the other way around? Now, what dog would do that to another dog? 8.) And Goofy has had a lot of jobs. One time he was a bus driver. Another time he was a cab driver. He drives, for Pete's sake. Pluto doesn't do that. He chases buses and cabs. He doesn't drive them. 9.) And what about the fingers? Goofy has fingers! Like all the Disney characters except Pluto, he has three on each hand. Please notice, I said, "hand." Dogs don't have fingers and they don't have hands! Take a look at Pluto. He's got paws. How much easier can this get? 10.) And when he eats - Goofy sits at the table like most normal folks and uses a knife and a fork - and napkins. Pluto has a dish on the kitchen floor and Mickey puts Dog Chow in it. Pluto hasn't the faintest idea how to use a fork or a knife. He gobbles his food like any dog would. So, I have concluded that Pluto is definitely the dog - the only one. Goofy has to be a person dressed up like a dog. And while I’m at it, Mickey and Minnie have to be people dressed up like mice. Donald and the nephews, likewise – not ducks. Now that I
have developed these credentials for myself on the Goofy controversy,
maybe I could sell it for a movie – Academy Award time? When
next the phone rings, could it be the Nobel people calling? Smyrnans can usually find Bill Cook wandering about town looking for a story of interest to folks in our locale. Maybe yours will be his next tale. You can write to him at PO Box 1029, New Smyrna Beach, FL 32170 or send e-mail to BillCook@BillCook.net.
Copyright
© 2007 Bill
Cook |
